Friday, December 09, 2005

Assumptions about Posters

Okay, I was thinking about people commenting on my blog – and on other blogs. Well, I know I use assumptions to process the people making the comments. So here is a glimpse of how I see some (and I will forget someone, sorry) of my visitors. Also, there is no ranking assigned to the list, other than Ddot, of course. He is always number one.

Ddot
Okay, everyone knows I faun over Ddot. All the girls do – and he is just so obnoxious (read: sure of himself). He reminds me of someone I went to high school with. He made good grades – and was sort of the class clown. Then he went off to college, studied RTF (Radio-Television-Film), I think because he thought that major would get him laid more often. "Sure, Baby, I can use you in my next film. I almost hesitate to mention it, but there is a nude scene. I need to see you topless before I make my decision." And after moaning on the casting couch, the woman is history. But she does not feel that bad about it – he taped it. Just joking (I think). Last I heard, he got a job at a television station and now anchors the news in a smallish market. Not Savannah, but in a similar market.

Georgia Peach
GP is easy – at first, I thought she was me 10 years ago. But after reading her blog for some time, I know we are different in many ways. But I still see her as me – it is just stuck in my brain. Also, I have read some of her posts on other blogs, and she is so compassionate herself. Much more so than I was in my mid 20s.

Storm
She is a tough nut to crack. I really don't know anyone like Storm. I just don't. I don't know that many talented people.

Video X
VX is so freaking complex. She is smart – an engineer pursuing her masters degree in engineering (part time) while working with stuff I really don't understand full-time. I had a girlfriend after I was first married who was so smart it made me sick. She was a runner as well, further tying the two images in my brain. We talked about everything – she had been married a few years more than me, and we would drink wine into the night. Probably different, though, is that she talked about all of the bizarre stuff she and her hubbie did in bed (and she showed me her arsenal of sex toys). I was very sheltered then and she had to explain quite a few of them to me.

Thomas
Thomas reminds me of my girlfriend's husband (from above). He was smart and cute, and every once in a while would make off-hand sexual comments to me. I was, of course, flattered and a bit pissed at the same time. Not sure if he ever knew it or not, but I knew his sexual likes and dislikes (not too many dislikes). He was probably the first person I wanted to fuck (besides hubbie) since we were married. No, we did not do anything. All in my mind.

Muse
Okay, this is more superficial of a parallel, but again, this is how my mind works. She looks very similar to a girl I knew in high school. I was a freshman, and she was a junior. It was my first elective class. She was absolutely gorgeous – and she was a cheerleader. We had cheerleaders and a cheer squad, and the cheerleaders were the "in crowd." She was in the in crowd. She did not talk to me much – remember, I was a freshman. But I admired her – partly because she changed my view of cheerleaders. I always thought of them as sort of vapid, and she was witty, smart, and talented. The only thing that was sad was one day I overheard some of the boys talking about her being on "the pill." "Can you imagine," one boy said, "being inside her all day long. I would never leave." I did not know it at the time – still being a virgin and all – but he could not have parked himself inside of her "all day long." He was probably a virgin as well.

Lilac Thief
One of my best friends in middle school. She was so sweet – I guess most of us were then, and I loved her like a sister. We drifted apart over time, and I lost track of her. Her blog, to my taste, is really insightful. But she posts about 5 posts per month – and not on a regular day – which I guess makes the connection between the two stronger (throughout high school I only got bits and pieces of information about my friend, as we started hanging out with different people). Yeah, I was sort of a bitch sometimes.

Kathi
Kathi reminds me of one of my cousins. From her comments on all blogs, she is so encouraging – so open and honest and so comforting. We used to go to the beach in South Carolina and pick up guys. But that was before we really knew what that meant. I sort of want Kathi's view of the world sometimes.

~Deb
Deb reminds me of a woman I worked with at a different job. I have already briefly written about this woman in another post, and I really want to write more about this woman. There are several traits that are similar – she is a lesbian, she has a mane of hair, and she is very talented. I mentioned before that we would eat lunch together when she visited "the home office." I was honored to be her friend, and I respected her more than I can express. I sometimes joke about how I am attracted to Deb – but that is just fun. It is more of a warm admiration than anything. So Madelene has nothing to worry about – I don't want to explore every inch of her skin with my tongue (by the way, I have tried this once, not on Deb, but on a guy; not all its cracked up to be, your mouth gets really dry).

Mark
Mark was one of my first regulars. He doesn't comment often, but I always read his comments. He sort of reminds me of my favorite uncle. He grew up in the 1960s (my uncle, not Mark), and his sexual exploits were hinted at when I was growing up. I don't think my relatives knew that we knew a bit more than they thought we knew.

Prata
Okay, Prata. Prata reminds me of our salutatorian in high school. He was an extremely precise person, always correcting people when their definitions were off a little. He was in my biology class (not the AP class he took later, but the first biology class). He was funny, too, but not the class clown cutup. He paid attention in class, just in case the teacher needed help. That is where I learned the term, "spring butt." But even so, he was popular in school. His dad was a physician, and I don't know what happened to him, but I picture him as a surgeon. You know, precise, exact, and he liked to play God. Yeah, Prata, I know your views on God, but remember, these are my thoughts bumping around in my head.

Mallory
Another high school girlfriend. I think it is easier to think of people as high school friends, because I don't really keep up and can shape my view of them in my mind. She was the editor of the yearbook – smart as a whip. She took a college course at a local community college because she was so smart (and took all of the advanced courses while in high school). Funny thing is that I ran into someone I knew in high school once, and we were asking about people from high school. He did not know what she was doing, but he did say that he fucked her in college. Thanks for that mental image. I am not saying that Mallory screwed Ted, but if she did, I dished up the dirt first.

Monica
Monica, you remind me of someone, but I really don't want to say who. It is sort of personal – yeah, a cop-out, but there you go.
[Edited to add: When I was in college, I hung around with a group of friends (guess that is kind of normal). There were 6 or 7 of us that would go clubbing, and hang out together. Now, I am not saying that I think of Monica this way, but she reminds me of one of the women of the group. That, of course, would not be embarrassing at all. The embarrassing part is that it was the only true lesbian experience I ever had. Well, a woman once kissed me (not my idea), but this was a "real" experience.

Not sure what "being lesbian is", but neither of us considered ourselves lesbian. But after we "did the deed," we continued doing it for nearly a week (it was actually awesome, sweet, tender, you get the idea). We stopped because neither of us wanted to be "lesbian." To my knowledge, no one ever found out.

A bit embarrassing - so I did not want to submit the details (in the original post). I saw my friend a few years ago - she looked great, had a hubbie, two children and was very happy. She married someone who was doing something with computers, and she was staying home with the children.

Anyway, she was smart, funny and "girl next door" sexy. She is the type that you think PTA, but she may have had 'cuffs under the bed.]


Grant
Grant reminds me of someone in college. He was handsome, intelligent, and pre-med. He was also a roommate's boyfriend. I think she wanted to marry him, but his plans included Med School and beyond, and she was just a pit stop on the road to his real goals. Weird fact – his penis was the first one I saw (briefly) when in college. Sort of a sad fact – as I was a bit of a shy one for a while (and one would expect that the first penis I ever saw would belong to someone I was intimate with). No, I never had sex with him (or wanted to). I was a bit intimidated by him – he was taking Calculus, while I was stuck in "baby math." The last time I heard of him was that he was in medical school (thinking that he would go into Pediatrics). Again, the cynic in me is thinking that is a line – "women love children" after all.

The Seeker
When I worked at a non-profit, I was sort of the shop manager. Not my title, but that occupied much of my time. Well, I had lots of salesmen calling on me to buy stuff to sell at our shop. He sold me lots of stuff. And this married man was my lover for more than one year (my only long-term lover when I was being unfaithful). In my defense, let's just say that we got deep discounts (but realistically, if he was selling me horse manure in cellophane marketed as an air freshener, I would have bought it). By the way, you should never screw someone you are doing business with – common sense, but it did not make sense until after I experienced it. Oh, was I dumb.

Joe
This one is going to sound more trite than the rest, but Joe reminds me of someone I dated in college. Why? Because he is from NYC. Anyway, this guy was a really nice guy, but all I can remember is conversations with him about him wanting to shave me down there. And, boy, he wanted to do it. I was this conservative little Catholic chick, and he wanted to mow my lawn. Oh, and he used to say, "New York, New York. A place so nice, they named it twice," when people asked him where he was from. I broke up with him because of the shaving "controversy."

Canadian Rose
One of my friends when I was in college was from Spain. She had a Visa (I think that is the document) to go to school here, and then she was to return to Spain. She was blond, beautiful and smart. All of the guys wanted a piece of her. She actually had to borrow a swim suit of mine because all of her bikinis were one piece. She just had bikini bottoms when she arrived. It was enlightening listening to her talk about different standards regarding alcohol, nudity and sexuality.

Bert Ford
Every time I see Bert Ford, I think of George Harrison. I have no idea why, but that's what pops into my little noggin. Now I am sure Apple Records will sue me (how is that for a vague joke?).

Lisa
Lisa pops here every once in a while, and I absolutely love her bra-less Tuesday. It is very creative, inventive, sort of in-your-face (poke you in the eye). She reminds me of an Aunt of mine – she is a character. She is originally from Russia (well, Estonia, but let's just call it Russia) – and she married into our crazy family. Physically, she looks similar – she is thin with really large perky breasts. I want her freaking genes. She is in a good marriage, but she says things, and you wonder, "hey, she is a housewife, she goes to PTA meetings, and she said that. And she would never cheat on my uncle.

SJ Blogger
A college friend. He was a guy friend who never made it to lover. You know, when in college (or even afterwards), it is hard to jump from one list to the other. He was attractive, athletic and smart. He participated in intramural sports – both because he was good at team sports, and he really liked making friends. And he could make them quickly. So when I see sjblogger, I sort of smell sweat (I got more sweaty hugs from my guy friend than anyone).

Goddess
I am still getting to know Goddess. She seems to be fairly new here – I would check out her blog; she may be one of the "Blogs of Note" after she has been on for a while.

This post is about three times as long as a regular post – sorry. My guess is that people will look for their names and not read the rest. And some will think, "Hey, crap, I don't see me on this list." First, "crap" is a sissy curse word, Kathi and I are the only ones that use such sissy words. Second, either I forgot you or you are so incredibly complex that I could not encapsulate you in just a few sentences.

30 comments:

Elle said...

Hello my best middle school friend. Thank you for the gracious honorable mention! I am back to blogging (more than 5 times a month) now that I have deleted the shithole that was myspace. It really is trashy kind of place...Oooo Good to be home.

Leesa said...

Oh, Lilac Thief, I did not know you were on MySpace. I really don't like that site (I had an account for a month, I think). And, Lilac Thief, I do read you still.

mal said...

I never jumped a "Teds" bones. Did I miss something good?

For some reason, you remind me a great deal of my college roomie, Angel. We were very different people interests wise but got along so well we lived together for 2 years. She was a lot less inhibited than I was. She was also one of the most comfortable people to be around I have ever known.

You were right on with Storm. I am clueless there too. She is an awesome talent though

kathi said...

I'm going to be honest here, I was honestly a little afraid to come read what you wrote about me after reading your comment on my blog...saying that you'd written about me. I've always thought you didn't like me very much. And, I guess that still could be the case. But, I've got to tell you, that nearly made me cry. That's possibly the sweetest thing anyone has ever said about me...and I kind of liked reading it, lol. I read it to my oldest and I read him the part about crap being a sissy word, telling him I'd told on my blog how I use crap and pooh, he laughed at me. I use to use the f*ck word in every sentence at least once till I was about 28. Then, I think kids say what kids hear...so I tend to go with the 'sissy' words, lol.

Hey, Leesa...thanks. You have no idea what a little lift like this can mean to some people.

MOAB said...

Leesa!!!
Tease.
Monica

mikster said...

This is really weird but I've been thinking about doing this very same type of post due to people talking about the interenet vs. real life.

Leesa said...

mallory: not sure; never jumped Ted's bones either. But apparently you were very good.

kathi: I have always enjoyed your comments. Sorry - I was just thinking about a roaring fire, a hot cup of cocoa, and me lost in my thoughts.

monica: Sorry. Did not mean to tease you.

mike: okay, you busted me. While you were sleeping, I inserted a probe in your brain and I get a daily print-out of all of your thoughts. I stole the idea from you. Oh, and shame of you for looking down her blouse. Yes, she is at the check-out counter, but you are not suppose to check her out!

Joe said...

Too funny.

Erm...for the record I promise not to ask you anything about shaving. Nor will I ever say that "New York, New York" thing.

It's the least I can do for you...

MZPEACH said...

Thanks for mentioning me. I am really really shy. So you know I had to grow some balls and post a comment. Isn't that silly?..lol.
I was so depressed yesterday. Thhis is really cheering me up. Thanks Leesa. You know what, my family (my sisters) read your site. We think you are so interesting. You and Ddot. But I learn so much from you. And let me tell you, I know that I would never know so much about you if we actually met in real life.
So this is actually (this blog) is one of the best things so far this year. I am trying to stick to some of your dieting suggestions also (now if I can only start working out five days a week)..lol. But anyway. The people you have wrote about are very interesting indeed. I am curious, do you let your hubby read this site?

Leesa said...

joe: thanks for not mentioning it. I am a little sensitive about the shaving thing (most cool women shave now).

GP: no, I don't let hubbie read it. But I try not to talk much about hubbie either. Oh, no, your sisters read me, too.

Ddot the King said...

What is a King to say? This is the coolest thing ever and I am very flattered!

I have had this comment box open for a minute trying to think of something witty/arrogant to say but I can't so I'll just say something that I usually try not to say....

Thanks. :)

Bert Ford said...

I get the George Harrison reference.
Though, I think the only thing he & I have in common is the fact that niether of us shave often enough.
He’s the only guy I’ve ever seen that could do the British thing without coming off gay.
Do you remember the time a guy broke into George’s house & before the cops could get there George kicked his ass?
George rocks.
Wasn’t he in a band before the Traveling Wilberries?

P.S. I read the whole thing.

Ddot the King said...

hater.

Leesa said...

ddot: yeah, I know, hard to say it. But I really enjoyed writing it. Another glimpse into my scattered brain.

bert ford: I figured you would get the joke. And I never thought about the gay thing, but you are, as usual, right. George actually had a solo career - and if you check the bargain bins, you might find an album or two. But at least he did not make the albums in his garage (Paul). I suspect you read the rest of the post for gratuitious sex (and there was none; darned).

arsons fire: not trying to steal ddot; I know he is yours. But you got to admit that his self-assurance is sexy (well, you don't have to admit it).

MOAB said...

Leesa, it's okay...and I wish I could sy you were totally off base (at least I think I wish that...)
Hmmmm....
It's really wierd though.
Monica

Leesa said...

Per Monica's permission-giving, I have edited the post slightly (under her name only, in italics).

Muse said...

Your such a sweetie!! Funny what people makes us think about huh? Me? I was never a cheerleader, nor was a popular..lol Imagine that. ;-)

I did read about all the others and will be visiting some to check them out.

Thanks for the mention and the compliment!

Anonymous said...

wow...it's always so interesting to hear something that someone perceives about me...especially on this blog stuff. i don't think i write about much personal stuff, but what i do write is always total honesty...and well...it's about me so inevitably there is personal stuff. but it's funny how one of the biggest things i used to try NOT to be was complicated (alright so maybe that's not the same as complex...but for these purposes anyway). HOWEVER, even my real life friends who have known me for years and think the same thing...so that's really kind of neat to me. you must be quite perceptive. it was easy to pick up that you're smart...never mind the fact your hot (i know..it's 3 years old, but still). it's odd how one (that would be me) can have respect for and seriously consider an opinion/observation from someone (that would be you) they don't really know! blogging is a weird phenomenon to me...but i like it. and i like that assessment of yours!

oh...and i'd be your girlfriend any day! i just did my first 3some (no actualy sex sex for me...yuck) thing a couple weeks ago. it sucked but another shot at it might change my mind.

Bored Housewife said...

I read 'em all. They are really fun, insightful, interesting. I would never cheat on your uncle, either. crap. I mean my husband. (hey, look! I used "crap", too--and I didn't read that italicized part until just now).

Prata said...

Okay then so you know I read about everything and let me just say, you all seem SO much more interesting now. heheheh. Seriously though, I'll now thank Leesa for ruining the better part of this month for making me want to read up more on you all (those mentioned obviously) and get to know ya a little better.

Oh and by the by, I was SO surprised to see my name up here. I don't want to say thanks because I know you're not doin it for my benefit lol..but it is interesting to see me pop up. That's twice now I've "made the headlines"! Gleeful!

Dax Montana said...

I just thankful I haven’t commented before now. But now that I have, it would seem I have opened myself up to your perception of me. So maybe I shouldn’t post this comment. Too late! The paradox has begun. Just Damn!

Deb said...

What a great idea to do something like this---thank you so much for adding my name up here!

And as far as Madelene----my future ex-wife---let your tongue get dry- I have plenty of water for you on the night stand! hehee!

You're a great person, I can tell. Not only that, I have been reading your blog for quite some time. In the beginning I didn't comment that much, cause I like to study my victims before I move in. ;) You're so well written, and you're addicting to read---seriously.

Thanks again for your kind words...and...remember, hydrate yourself girl! ;)

{{hugs}}

If you're ever in NY--look me up! Let's do lunch! ............(or each other)

mfophotos said...

Oh well, at least you didn't say I reminded you of a grandfather! However, I would be glad to be your "uncle" (wink-wink). You are a hottie, anyway.

KyuBall said...

(Fishing for recognition...)

I'm new too! I just don't comment enough on your blog.

Kyu = Lurker

Ok...now this is funny: the word verification for this comment is "fksud". Fuck Sud. Only on your blog Leesa.

facade said...

i suppose my absence of recent days has caused you to forget your silly naughty louisiana friend....and bou..well he is waving at ya!

Boris Yeltsin said...

Love your blog. You are an addicting read. The people who come here are fun reads as well. Looks like you've got the girl-on-girl research for your book covered, just by reading some of these posts! I'd love to read something like that from you!

Greg - Cowboy in the Jungle said...

What??? I didn't make the "A" list? Oh, the humanity!

Uh, wait... Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I dont get by and comment as much as I'd like to. Yup. I'll bet that's it.

OK. Reading more and posting more.

sarego said...

Hi,
Thanx for visiting my blog.
I am also amazed at the wide
variety of viewpoints in blogs.
I am not yet as established a blogger to write about those writing comments. Anyway good work
from u...Bye

Leesa said...

muse: yeah, you are my cheerleader. So when you post, I think, "cool girl is talking to me." Oh, joy.

vid x: not sure how perceptive I am. What is that saying, "even a stopped clock is right twice a day." I have heard that even a broken clock is right twice a day, and it may not be right that often. Think about it. Oh, a virtual girlfriend. Wow.

And the girl-girl thing was really good for me - but I am not sure it would have been with any random girl. The best part is the kissing. So amazing.

lisa: oh, no, Lisa, you used Kathi and my sissy word. But it won't hurt your popularity.

prata: yeah, prata, how did you make the list? By the by, I have been interested in your last couple of posts.

dax: You remind me of Schrodinger's cat.

Deb: oh, Deb, don't tempt me.

mark: yeah, my uncle would wink at me.

kyuball: yeah, I am not sure of who you are yet. Still no impression. Are you my therapist?

devilgyrl: welcome to blogspot. There are some good reads among the people I read.

ken: sorry, I have not seen my southern man lately.

boris yeltsin: I have going back and forth about writing about girl-on-girl. My one experience was very special, and I am not sure I want to expose it. Maybe something more fictional.

Greg - Cowboy in the Jungle: yeah, sorry about that, greg.

golden oriole: I would recommend reading any of these people. Really interesting stuff.

Anonymous said...

*smiles*