Fundamentalist Wackos and Cum Stains

Okay, yesterday I posted twice, once on my site and once on Ddot's site. And I am sort of pooped from writing, partly because I re-read what I posted for my site and, truth be told, it was not very good. Plus I did not get many comments yesterday. A few more hits than normal, but that was probably because I was a guest blogger. I actually did not visit that many blogs yesterday because blogger seemed to be hiccupping.

Fundamentalist Wackos
So since I am already going to do a crappy post, I figure I would talk a little religion today. Not a lot of religion, but a little bit. I know some people who say that they literally read the Bible – they believe each and every work should be taken literally.

When I run into one of these fundamentalist wackos, I will ask one of the two following questions:

"Did you ever discover where Cain got his wife?"
"Have you ever looked lustfully at a woman?"

Okay, the first question usually gets them to stuttering. Sadly, I did not make this question up; it was asked to William Jennings Bryan at the Scopes Monkey Trial in 1925, and this fundamentalist could not answer the question.

The second question, when the inevitable answer is "yes" (I used the term "women" because most of these wackos are men), I ask them why they have not gouged their own eyes out, as the Beatitudes, one of the more quoted passages, says this about it:

But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell. Matthew 5: 28-30

Personally, I like the word "gouged." It sounds so horrible and descriptive, and it tends to repulse fundamentalists. And I like repulsing them.

Museums
Have you ever noticed that museums seem to be full of the same sort of stuff wherever you go? I mean, you have pottery, stuffed animals, old bones, whatever. I mean, how much more traveled would museums be if there were wacky displays. I mean, if there was a museum with cum stains that looked like famous people, how many of us would want to see it and pick up some postcards?

Soccer
I am not much of a sports fan, but here is what I don't get – we have all of these kids playing soccer in the US, mothers taking them to their games and all, and as a nation, we don't give a hoot about soccer or the World Cup.

On Empty
I am so tired this morning. I have no idea why this is, but it has zapped my will to write something witty. Even though this is one of those bad posts, I can't not post something because I post every day I am at work. Blogger has been horrible lately, so my guess is that some of you are just frustrated without being about to post when you want to or leave comments easily.