Wednesday, April 19, 2006

The Skirt

I have thought about sharing the following, but it does two things that I am not sure I want to do:

1. Place me in a less-than-wonderful light. I like being the virginal, innocent blogger that you have come to know and love, and

2. Me and some of my co-workers come off as some sort of reverse female-chauvinist-pig.

But what the hey!

Okay, at our work, we lease our copy machines, and along with leasing these machines, we have some sort of service contract. Anything that goes wrong and we (me) pick up the phone and place a service call. Within the day or next day, we get service and everyone is happy. Nothing new so far.

Well, about seven months ago, we got a new fix-it person. I wanted to say that we got a new "copier guy", because that's what I call him, but you see, the new copy repair person is a girl. Well, a woman.

Now, a few weeks ago, I entered a room and a conversation mid-sentence, and they were talking about "the skirt," and without any context, I knew exactly who they were talking about. This woman! She wears the shortest skirts year-round. And I have always seen her in a skirt.

And before you ask, Grant, no she is not Asian! And she is not some hot dentist or dental hygienist. She does have really nice legs, but that is not the point. She is known by what she wears – short skirts. And everyone around here seems to be calling her, "the skirt."

Then I start thinking – and, no, not about this girl. I make many of the calls, and I think I have been calling our copier company more and more since she started working at our location (I almost typed, "servicing us," but it is not like that). Now, this could be that she is really bad at fixing the copy machine. But I don't think that is the issue. I think people are jamming the machine on purpose. I mean, for a while, we had this really hot guy, and some of the girls (including me) would joke about jamming the machine on purpose. But we didn't do it. And I am wondering if people are jamming the machine on purpose. Yeah, those INTJ's out there are probably thinking, "perhaps your machine is aging, and it is more prone to breakdowns." To that, I say, "I am so going to label you!" (Inside joke, sorry.)

And I feel really bad about calling her "the skirt." It reminds me of some class in college, where we learned about certain demeaning names that men have given women over the years (gotta love liberal arts education). One name was "skirt," because it describes women by an article of clothing or that a woman is important because of what the skirt contains. This was one of those classes where I would read a short story, and the professor would talk about all of these sexual innuendos that completely went over my head. The other thing about that class is a story about trucks and trucking – and apparently, it was all about homosexual sex. News to me. You see, the story used the word "Peterbuilt." Apparently, that means big penis. Again, I was a freshman and very naive at the time.

I remember in the cold of winter, our copier person – "the skirt" – coming to fix the machine, and she had this really big coat on. I sort of wanted a coat like it (for the three weeks I could actually use it). Anyway, she takes it off, and there she is, in her little skirt. She must only wear short skirts. And I thought to myself, "I want her legs." No, I thought to myself, "I would be freezing my ass off were I she." And then I thought, "Nice ass." Just joking – I thought, "I sure wish the copier guy was still servicing us. I mean, he was freakin' hot."


~Deb said...

Oh come on, don't give me that 'just joking' b/s! You know she had a nice bum! ;)

Believe me, if I were there, that copier would need a service call 24/7. That's just me though.


Bud said...

Everybody needs a nice visual diversion during the working day. When I was teaching elelmentary school,it was mostly mothers of kindergartners. That, sadly, is about as good as it got.

Stacy The Peanut Queen said...

I miss my old job position where people would come and go all day long and I got to see everyone.


Now, I'm way upstairs, in my own little office and no one visits me anymore. (Which I guess is a good thing, 'cause it makes it MUCH easier to surf the web for porn when you don't have anyone looking over your shoulder.;)

See what working by yourself will do to a girl???!!! ;)

Christian said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Christian said...

OK, I will slow down and type more carefully this time:
I think it would be less expensive for the company to pay her an appearance fee rather than have the copier willfully broken. Maybe a regular Thursday thing and everyone can be called to the central viewing location?

Grant said...

I'm supposedly INTJ, and my first thought was "aging copier."

As for all the sexual innuendo, I think some of it might be intended by the writer, but a lot of that is what the reader puts into it (I've never heard of that definition of Peterbuilt). I wrote a story involving a demon corrupting someone, and a reader complimented me for my cautionary tale against drug abuse. Really not where I was going with that, but I've learned that there is a relationship between writer and reader and sometimes signals get mixed. I've also learned that so-called experts (critics and teachers) misinterpret writings as much as the rest of us.

Mike said...

So is this random commentary or is there an actual problem. I think it's sad that people judge competance by the length of the skirt.


GirlGoyle said...

No need to feel bad. If she didn't want to be noticed or wasn't looking for attention she woulnd't be wearing inappropriate and revealing clothing to work. I mean "servicing" a "machine", wheather peterbuilt or not, can require bending and kneeling. A skirt isn't the right attire for a copier. Slut! Unless ofcourse it is copymachine company tactics, service is more lucrative.

kathi said...

First, let me thank you for bringing back some really great memories that had some how gotten lost.

Second, let me thank you for your #1, it made me smile.

And, third, she probably wouldn't mind being known as 'the skirt'. I know I wouldn't. I'd love to have longer legs and shorter skirts...wait, I hate skirts. Maybe I wouldn't if my legs were longer. I'm 5'3ish, and I'm not all legs.

Good stuff.

~Deb said...

Girlgoyle,'s HOT! ;)

thistle said...

girlgoyle, you say that like it was bad or something.

Leesa said...

~deb: yes, she has a nice bum, but she doesn't turn me on at all. But she does get the office buzzing.

bud: funny. Those "good looking mums" as they are called in England, I am told. Funny.

stacey: sometimes searching the Internet for porn is better when it is a group effort. Kidding!

christian: I guess your first post had typos because you were typing with one hand. I know, I am a hottie and my words alone make you hard. Just kidding. Seriously, I think the company is probably losing money with their pick of copier personnel. The guy was smokin' and the girl is hot, too.

grant: yeah, my first thought was aging copier as well. Really. And I love when you make comments on writing. Love your viewpoint - and I think you would make a really good Freshman Creative Writing professor, with or without Asian coeds.

mike: please don't look for content here. For content, go to, er, Mallory's blog.

girlgoyle: I sometimes wonder if people really know the signals they are sending with what they wear. Could be habit from growing up dressing a certain way. But when I see her, I think "slut."

kathi: thanks for such a sweet comment. I am 5'2" and I am not all legs.

thistle: funny man.

Stacy The Peanut Queen said...

I'm with Kathi...I'm 5'3"ish and I'd LOVE to have longer legs....preferably all the way up to my neck, thankyouverymuch.

And Leesa, The PK does a right fine job but sometimes...well...a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do! ;)

JD said...

i like women who are a bit more assertive. :) and i like all your stories, so post on!!!

Grant said...

BTW, reverse pig sounds deliciously naughty. I'm probably still thinking of your recent reverse cowgirl post.

Leesa said...

stacey: I didn't think we could get the body we deserved just by wishing. I liked your idea of having a button that could change your figure based on what was considered sexy at the time. Not sure what "a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do! ;)" means.

jd: assertive? Moi?

grant: reverse pig. You know, there are some animals a gal doesn't want to be described as, and "pig" is near the top of the list.

Stacy The Peanut Queen said...

I meant that if I can't get it done with the group, I'll do it myself...;)

And I left a long rambling comment on your post from December 1st that you linked in my comments, just so you know. That "Playing House" was an a great post...I can relate to that SO MUCH, it's almost unreal.

JD said...

Leesa, oui. ;) i'll have to go back into the archives to read the Dec 1st story, thanks to Stacy. sheesh, i won't get anything done today. lol. at least Stacy's not getting anything done either. i'm in good company. ;)

JD said...

okay, 1 Dec post read and commented. :)

Blonde Vigilante said...

Wouldn't it be nice to have people purposely break a machine for the simple fact that you were sooooo hot they just had to see you again. Then again, maybe she just sucks at fixing the machine.

The Kept Woman said...

As far as "The Skirt" goes...there are much worse nicknames. Feel not guilty. And if she's over 35, Stacy (of What Not to Wear) would probably have called her something much worse...

Pittchick said...

Is she young? I was just eating lunch outside today and there are a ton of college girls running around in less than appropriate clothing.

Maybe the whole "copier service" is a cover and she's really servicing the guys in the office?

Joe said...

The again, I'd imagine that being decribed by an an article of clothing would be preferable to being described as certain body parts.

caryl said...

To be called a skirt is not bad at all,,if your legs do the term justice. Myself i have received comments many times on my legs, and feel great about it,,so no problem with the term.

Janet said...

Women check other women out. I'm just putting that out there.

But a short skirt in winter? That's almost as bad as the half-way-buttoned-up shirt problem that has taken over men over sixty. (*shudder*). The right pair of jeans can show off legs very nicely. Perhaps next time you bump into her, you can begin a loud conversation about these "amazing" jeans you found yesterday.

Nice story.

cherish said...

I had to laugh at this story because our copier guy is scary. He thinks he is "Da Bomb" he strolls in like the savior of all and I think he is "the bomb" (BBBBOOOOMMM) very creepy.

I think she should dress more appropriately because I am pretty sure you are right someone is jamming the machines. They probably love seeing her bend over the machines.

When my children were in preschool there was a mom who always wore shorts. Dead of winter and she would have on her shorts. She had long beautiful tanned legs. I asked her one time why she always wore shorts, she smiled at me and said because I think my legs are my best feature. I think I would rather be warm!!

I am very relieved this post did not change my mind about your innocent virginal blogging status, winks!!

mal said...

mmmmmm, I always wanted to able to wear a short skirt too! Maybe I should shop in the petites? *G*

I spent a semester in grad school working thru "Gifts" really boring reading but enlightening. Most of us work in a default modality (INTJ in my case, AAARGGGH!) but like a switch hitter, we can move into other modalities with practice. To carry the base ball analogy further, we may be right handers but how good of a right hander are we? Meyers/Briggs makes for interesting conversation.

Leesa said...

stacey: I normally don't pimp previous posts, but it seemed appropriate. Not the most well-written post, but it does reveal more of me than I normally reveal (and, no, no HNT)

jd: hey, you are stealing all of my blogging buddies. Pretty soon you will not have time for my dribble.

blond v: one of my real fantasies is for a waiter to drop a tray when I enter the room. No bodily fluids involved in this fantasy, but it is one of my favs.

kept: we have someone here who is almost 60 and is baring her midriff. She did this once - and I am almost positive she got a talkin'. She is way fit, but please.

dna princess: she is young, hot (but doesn't do a thing for me), and she knows it (knows she is hot, probably assumes I want to jump her too).

joe: would you rather be known as "the turlteneck" or "loooooooong john silver".

caryl: your blog name is "high heels and short skirts." Care to show a little leg on Thursdays?

janet: I check out women for two reasons: (1) to size up the competition, and (2) because, occasionally, I am a bit turned on. But it is so much more #1 with me.

cherish: I really have not seen her fix a machine, but I was wondering about how she did it with her skirt without being less appropriate. If you know what I mean. I would be kneeling on the floor, as long as I wasn't wearing hose.

mallory: INTJs are not so common, and there are several of us around here. I count at least 4 - and the blog entry I just posted teases the INTJ a bit more (I wrote it before I saw your post).

Sheen V said...

I wish our copier person were the skirt, or even the computer repair guy. Very few women around here that are worth oogling.

Sheen V said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
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