Fear

I don't know why I was doing this last week, but I heard somewhere that fear of public speaking was the most common fear, followed closely behind by the fear of death. And I thought to myself, "Okay, if someone had to give a speech, would that mean that they would consider suicide so that they did not have to speak publicly."

So I searched for a list of fears. The only one I found, seemed to be a site that seemed like it wanted to treat your fears through an Internet online course. For your un-education, I will list it below. I don't believe the list, but it is a list.

I have been scared lately. Scared of lots of things. I have been scared that I will sit down at my computer and just push out garbage for this blog. I fear that because I am blogging, I am not doing something more important. Then of course, I say to myself, actually my employer is paying for my blogging. They are my benefactor, so to speak. An unknowing benefactor, but a benefactor nonetheless.

I have been scared of having a heart attach. Nothing physically has happened to me, but I have had some crises which I have had little control over lately, and they are weighing on me. I don't want to mention the particulars, but I have been thinking about them and they have colored my mood. Funny, though, because I am a 30-something woman, I always discount heart attacks, and I blame this on stereotypes on sit-coms.

One of my blogging buddies is separated from her husband. How courageous this woman is. I can see power in her words, in her thoughts. But I wonder if she is scared, if she doubts what she is doing. I know she does, but she is so strong.

I decided that to test my fears, I should crawl through the air duct in the office (claustrophobia). While crawling through it, I will probably see spiders (arachnophobia), and I will eventually poke my head out of another air return, probably getting a mile high view of another work area (acrophobia). Once there, I may throw up (emetophobia), or worse, wonder if there is anything in the air duct I am breathing which will cause cancer (carcinophobia).

I don't feel so good. I am scared.

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Ten most common phobias
1. Arachnophobia: Fear of Spiders. Half of women and 10 per cent of men have a fear of spiders.
2. Social Phobia: Fear of being evaluated negatively in social situations.
3. Aerophobia: Fear of flying.
4. Agoraphobia: Agoraphobia involves intense fear and avoidance of any place or situation where escape might be difficult or help unavailable in the event of developing sudden panic-like symptoms.
5. Claustrophobia: Fear of being trapped in small confined spaces.
6. Acrophobia: Fear of heights.
7. Emetophobia: Fear of vomit.
8. Carcinophobia: Fear of cancer.
9. Brontophobia: Fear of thunderstorms.
10.Necrophobia: Fear of death or or dead things