Wednesday, July 12, 2006

EB White and NY Talk Shows

Interesting Comment
Okay, I got the following comment from someone from a NY show. Of course, I really don't want to appear as a guest on the show – I just want to let people know who read my blog. If anyone else wants to be a guest on the show, feel free to say you saw the comment on my blog. Just don't say you want to be a guest to have sex with the host – a handsome bald psychiatrist. That would sort of be a bad thing, especially if you are really battling a sex addiction.
I work for a new daytime talk show in NYC. We are doing a show on women and various forms of addiction. I am especially interested in women who are addicted to pornography. If you are struggling with an addiction, I would love to talk to you more about it.

This could be your chance to share your story with the rest of America and receive advice from our host (a licensed psychiatrist).

Feel free to call me at our toll free number:
1.888.372.2569 (ext. 4294), or you can email me at

Thank you!!!

Ms. Popular
Here I am, looking at my weekly report from sitemeter, and the numbers are really up. I want to think it is because my writing is intoxicating, riveting, awe-inspiring. But that is not the case. There is some new blog-type search engines, and apparently, because of their logic, my blog tends to bubble up to the top. Well, that, and my sex addiction post seems to have generated some buzz. Not like a ~Deb-Dani mud wrestling frenzy, but a little buzz nonetheless.

So to be less popular, I will start posting about the Baseball All-Star game, or soccer, or offshore drilling techniques. Unfortunately, I know little about the Baseball All-Star game, or soccer, or offshore drilling techniques. Okay, I have seen all kinds of drilling techniques, but I digress.

Almost one page
I have wasted two-thirds of a page talking about almost nothing. There is an art to talking about nothing – perhaps I should start writing a Seinfeld-esque situation-comedy.

I love reading about writing, and I don't know about you, but I have been reading Grant's blog about writing. Well, his blog is really about Ninja Bunny Dentists, but he conceals that fact in his talk about writing or eating Asian food.

I have certain rules, one of which is to limit myself to one page of writing. I violate that rule about once per week, so it is really a guideline more than a rule. And I know there are lots of grammar rules – Grant has been talking about them for a few days. He seems to be the EB White of bloggers. For me, my writing rules are simple – don't let words get in the way of an idea or story. I have seen many people who write well – and can do so for a page or so. Perhaps I just limit myself to a page to hide my poor writing skills. Anyone can write a page that looks half-decent. I rarely actually read my page, though.

I have not been part of a writer's group – well, I guess I have, but instead of Grant's experience, everyone was pussyfooting around the truth. I have read pure trash, and everyone gushes over the work. All I am thinking is, "what the heck do those words mean?" If I can't figure out the reason for the communication, who cares that they use alliteration or onomatopoeia.

Crap, I am over a page again. And this time, I really didn't say a darned thing – a much worse rule-breaker than the one-page guideline.


Heather said...

WOOOHOOOOO... very cool!

Talking about nothing or not, you still rock.. I mean really, if it worked for Seinfeld for 9 seasons..

Pittchick said...

Let's see, the all star game was in pittsburgh last night, finally the city can get back to normal now.
Soccer doesn't get nearly as much airplay in the US as it deserves.

My hubby used to work for an oil company that did off-shore drilling.


Tony said...

There are LOTS of men out there that want to talk to women who say they are addicted to pornography.....

I noted your link to Grants blog and checked it out. Looks a little morbid but I liked the style; straight forward, take it or leave it, no holds barred kind of style.

I agree with heather; you Rock. I can't fill a page talking about nothing yet you make it appear easy while retaining the interesting quality that makes your's a great blog to read.

Mike said...

I have no rules...and often blog about nothing.

~Deb said...

I feel you're quite ascetic and feel the need to close off that pro-like writing style to appear as a dilettante. If it was up to Gant, he'd have you truckle around serving him sushi while he types away; which is quite nugatory in my opinion.

I feel that your excoriation of your own writing needs to be expunged.

*SIGH* ughhhhhhh.... That just exhausted me.

(that was a joke)

I think writers are like artists. In "my book" there are no rules. Jump out of the box and fly all over the place if you want. Don't hold back---even if your intelligence levels hit way above the average ... (which I think it is...)

Write the way you want.

Oh and the search engines? Those things are awful. On my sitemeter, I have people googling, "bump on my head", "psychiatric care", "lesbian sex", "Christian values" and "gigantic atomic chickens". I don't know how they reach me with those key words. Also, a lot of bloggers rely on search engines with keyword loading. If they have a black page, they will write in 'black text' sex, lesbian, xxx, porn and other massive keywords to get people to come in. Highlight someone's page--watch and be surprused. NOT naming names or nuttin'...but it's fricken funny as hell.

The sad thing? Most people who are 'searching for that', usually tap in, and tap right back out just as fast. A waste of a visit.

Good morning LEESA!!!! I have spoken WAY too much. I gotta lay off the coffee.

~Deb said...

*Grant* ... Sorry, I didn't mean to spell his name wrong. I must bow down to him ..........and serve him misu soup.

Leesa said...

heather: thanks, sweetie. You rock, too.

DNA: looks like you discussed it well.

tony: grant is a wonderful writer. I don't like his design, but love his writing!

mike: you corner the blogging universe with your pee and your Subway stories.

~deb: I found you by typing "lesbian sex" and "gigantic atomic chickens". You were one of three sites that were listed. Joking! You actually commented on my site when I wrote a piece about not wanting to be a lesbian. A very early post. Now that I have been reading you for a while, looks like being a lesbian is better than I ever imagined!

Grant said...

Yes, recognize my innate superiority. Bow down to me, Amerikan no chiisai usagi.

I consider writing to be an art form so I treasure creativity and interesting writing over a bunch of arbitrary rules, although I do think the basic rules of grammar are should be followed. If I didn't, my stories would start like "Freem bloo fluddy `~)%&(& blatrk...". I love silly sounds. I know - I'm so gay. :p

And I'm with ~Deb - you can stop being so self-depricating. Your writing is good and interesting, even when you're posting about nothing. =)

~Deb said...

Being a lesbian has its perks...but it certainly has its disadvantages with the radical Christians bopping me over the head with their bibles.

Goddess said...

At least you can write about nothing. When I have nothing to say, I have nothing to say. So, that says a whole heck of a lot. With that being said, I have nothing else to say. :)

Leesa said...

grant: I need to look up the word, "self-depricating". You see, I am not really good with English.

~deb: yeah, I imagine there are definite disadvantages with certain loving Christian groups.

goddess: your comment may be labeled "self-depricating". Maybe I will have something to say tomorrow.

Stacy The Peanut Queen said...

Rules??? We don't need no steenking rules!!! ;)

I make it up as I go along...;)

I sure missed reading you! :)

kathi said...

I'm trying to look up rules in my dictionary, but it looks like that page has been torn out. :)

Leesa said...

stacy: hey, you are the one who has the IT department from heck! Miss you too, babe!

kathi: not nice to deface books. I have two copies of the rulebook!

minijonb said...

i used to go a couple of writer's groups on a regular basis. the trip to the bar after and the social interaction always seemed to be more important to most attendees, including myself. and now i'm part of the biggest writer's group of them all: the blogosphere.

Bruce said...

If I wrote only when I had something to say, I'd blog about 3 or 4 times a month; so I look for stuff to write about. As Rush sang, "Something's better than nothing..."

sdRay said...

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Kuan Gung said...

Great coach he was...thank you

Monica said...

Goddess-- I am the same way---and even if I have something to say, the feeling and the mood has to be right.
So I just smile at Leesa alot. And sometimes I even type it to her.

Leesa said...

minijonb: yeah, a long time ago, I actually wrote a little for a literary magazine. I hated the social interaction, but I had to do that to get published.

bruce: yeah, me too.

sdray: thanks for the SPAM

kuan: good coach, good man.

monica: I won't do anything for a while. Still thinking about it.

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Anonymous said...

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