Friday, November 04, 2005

Flunking the Test

Yesterday, I made a comment about Air Force people on my blog, and got a little grief. Earned, I am sure. But I go to this guy's site, and I take a little quiz. And I turn out to be Buddhist. And I never knew.













You fit in with:
Buddhism



Your ideals mostly resemble those of the Buddhist faith. Spirituality is the most important thing in your life. You strive to live by all of your ideals, and live a very intellectually focused life.


20% spiritual.
20% faith-oriented.















Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com


You think you know a soul, and you turn out to be Buddhist. Then I start to read about Buddhism – okay, I know little on the subject, and since the Internet is – cough – the best source to obtain reliable information, I am sure this is true as well. Okay, take this with a grain of salt – sort of like me saying Air Force officers are wimps (and each one of them can kick my ass). Instead of Ten Commandments (the real deal-breakers in most Christian religions), they have five precepts:

1. Kill no living thing.
2. Do not steal.
3. Do not commit adultery.
4. Tell no lies.
5. Do not drink intoxicants or take drugs.

Before I read them, I thought "5 rules are easier to follow than 10." Of course, the biggie I broke is still on there (drat, can't catch a break). Then I looked at the first one – ouch. Kill no living thing. Then I look at the list. Crap, I may have broken all five rules at once.

Consider one afternoon:

I took a long lunch at a salesman's house. No rules broken so far. Then we ended up having sloppy sex (rule 3 broken). I told him he had the most delicious cum I have ever tasted (rule 4 broken). We may have had wine (rule 5 broken). There was spermicidal lubricant on the condom (millions of living sperm were killed, no doubt – the ones that did not make their way into my tum-tum; heck, they were killed as well, rule 1 broken). And afterwards, when I was cleaning up, I probably sprayed a sprits of his wife's perfume on my neck (rule 2 broken).

Holy crap, I would be a rotten Buddhist.

22 comments:

kathi said...

You are one of the funniest (and most real) people I read on here. I'm on my way to take the test too.

kathi said...

LOL, Buddhist too. 8o% spiritual. Who knew?

Leesa said...

Thanks, kathi - I have been called irreverent at times. I enjoy studying religion, I really do, and I don’t mean to make fun of different religions. Well, I guess I do. But I have great respect for many religions. Heck, being Catholic, I have to have sort of sense of humor about some things.

sjblogger said...

Well hell... rules are made to be broken... and breaking all five at once is an impressive feat!

Grant said...

Every online religious quiz I've taken rates me somewhere between Atheist / Agnostic and devil worshipper. I have no problem with that.

Thomas said...

Leesa... Oh, Leesa...

I know you're being good now, but man-o-man...

Glad you're not anywhere nearby as some of my more imaginative ideas might just lead us both astray...

(Including candles, ice, soft restraints, oil, paddles and more "toys" than you can shave an 18 inch double-ended dildo at.)

Georgiapeach said...

Leesa you know you didn't have to link me because I linked you..lol. When you link me I want it to be because I have really impressed you! I absolutley love your blog. That's why I linked you. It's all good. We don't have to play those kind of games. You know what I am saying?

@Grant I don't think that surprises any of us..lol :)!

Leesa said...

GP: I linked onto you for two reasons: (1) I read your blog nearly every day and I am basically lazy so I wanted the link for my lazy ass; and (2) Your last post (the Tuesday post, not today's post) was one of the best posts I have read to date. I laughed my ass off.

I actually was thinking of writing about the same subject Monday - not the exact same, just sort of my response. I am still debating on it, though, because I don'w want to steal your thunder.

Sweets, you are a hot stock and I wanted to link to you. Totally selfish on my part, I promise you.

Leesa said...

And, GP, your comment on Grant was so funny. I love reading Grant's stuff, but he saves his best stuff for ddot.

Mark said...

Leesa -- maybe you should just start your own religion -- You could have the major deity Phallus, and his assitant the god Testacles (say it like Hercules). Think of the rituals you could cum up with.

Well as far as breaking the rules... maybe the Buddhists have less worry about retribution for breaking them. At least you had fun...

Leesa said...

mark: you guys are all the same! not only do you want us to suck your penises, you want us to freekin' worship them!

I love men!

That Girl Tam said...

Hey there...saw your comments on Life in a Handbasket about being interested in Wicca. I'm a solitary eclectic wiccan. I was raised Catholic, but studied Wicca and Paganism for about 7 years before I felt comfortable enough to come out of the "broom closet". Go with what moves you and touches your soul. I admire people that study lots of religions to make informed decisions instead of going with the norm...if ever u have questions, feel free to ask!

I'm not Wiccan because I think it's cool. Little do people know there is still a huge stigma involved in being a witch...

Blessed be...

Slut Betty said...

That was great Leesa... I did the test and came up Taoism... hell I'd not even heard of that before... and I thought I had heard of all of them... I've remained pretty open to any form of religion since I broke away from the church... still consider myself a Christian but I know it's not as neat and tidy as MOST Christians claim it to be... and I certainly DO NOT condone the actions or hyprocrisy of a lot of Christians... I think I might look into this Taoism a little more now and see what it's all about... great post (as per usual)

Mark said...

Oh that's OK -- I worship and kneel at the Lady Vagina...

Georgiapeach said...

Ha! I'm sorry Leesa. Now you know that I am such a insecure spoiled little brat. I'm busted :)!

Georgiapeach said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Wendy said...

You are too funny! Karma baby - Karma! I took the test and it came up Taoism - but I've spent the last year checking out Buddhism ... whodathunkit?

Barney said...

LOL.......Geat bit of fun, Leesa.....maybe we have enough members here to start a Taoist sect now?...*winks*

sÞ¡ηηєє said...

hehe...i got myself Taoist *gasp* .. nowadays Taoism & Buddhism a little overlapping each other anyway...

oh ya.. those rules are to make sure you don't get karmic retribution. see if u can try to follow..lol

but at the end of the time, it's very subjective to be kind or not harm anything alive.. hard to explain over here, but I feel no matter wat a human heart's should stay good...

oh ya buddism is more of a self-improvement belief , not really classified as a religion :)

mal said...

Damn! its no fun being a buddhist. Think I will stick with Hedonist

Leesa said...

tam: I enjoy studying religion, but not looking to change at this time.

GP: You had me fooled.

wendy: not sure, but if I followed it, I would be a better person. Guess that's the point.

michael: About the Taoist sect; might be the first one to have leather choker colors as uniforms.

spinee: thanks for the comment. Many subjects are hard to explain in a line or on a bumper sticker.

mallory: A conservative Hedonist. I think you have lots of material for a blog, girlfriend!

Barney said...

Hehehe...like the thought Leesa!...do we get the leads supplied or do we have to buy our own? *winks*