Thursday, March 06, 2008

When Harry Met Leesa

One of my favorite movies is When Harry Met Sally. I have not seen it in years, but I still play scenes in my mind. And I even have, on rare occasions, seen some bloggers writing and thought, "Hmmm. He seems just like Harry. I hope he finds someone."

Sally Albright: Is Harry bringing anybody to the wedding?
Marie: I don't think so.
Sally Albright: Is he seeing anybody?
Marie: He was seeing this anthropologist, but...
Sally Albright: What's she look like?
Marie: Thin. Pretty. Big tits. Your basic nightmare.

Marie's line that punctuates the scene is classic girl talk. Women are so competitive – I still am. I have probably looked at the same number of woman's asses as my husband. Okay, maybe not, but I look at women's butts and think, "Bitch. She has a nice ass." Or, "My ass is better than her ass." And I don't like calling women bitches in my mind. Translation: I want to have the best ass in the room.

When I was in my mid-twenties, I could hold my own. Now that gravity has started yanking down my caboose, I try to avoid rooms full of bikini models, Victoria's Secrets shoppers and college co-eds.

Sally: When Joe and I started seeing each other, we wanted exactly the same thing. We wanted to live together, but we didn't want to get married because every time anyone we knew got married, it ruined their relationship. They practically never had sex again. It's true, it's one of the secrets that no one ever tells you. I would sit around with my girlfriends who have kids - and, actually, my one girlfriend who has kids, Alice - and she would complain about how she and Gary never did it anymore. She didn't even complain about it, now that I think about it. She just said it matter-of-factly. She said they were up all night, they were both exhausted all the time, the kids just took every sexual impulse they had out of them. And Joe and I used to talk about it, and we'd say we were so lucky we have this wonderful relationship; we can have sex on the kitchen floor and not worry about the kids walking in. We can fly off to Rome on a moment's notice. And then one day I was taking Alice's little girl for the afternoon because I'd promised to take her to the circus, and we were in the cab playing "I Spy" - I spy a mailbox, I spy a lamp-post - and she looked out the window and she saw this man and this woman with these two little kids. And the man had one of the little kids on his shoulders, and she said, "I spy a family." And I started to cry. You know, I just started crying. And I went home, and I said, "The thing is, Joe, we never do fly off to Rome on a moment's notice."
Harry: And the kitchen floor?
Sally: [sadly] Not once. It's this very cold, hard Mexican ceramic tile.

I remember this scene as well.

I have written about not having children a couple of times. Here is one post and I know there are others. I am just too busy to look for others right now.

I know this scene is about loving someone who wants other things. Someone who says that he wants one thing because that's what he wants with you. I privately prayed that Joe's thingie would fall off in the shower. Enough about me being a hateful bitch.

When my husband and I married, we wanted certain things. And children was way up there on the list. But things happen, and we can't have kids. We have gone round and round with adoption. The subject is still open, but we are not the perfect adoptive parents. We are getting "older". I have a girlfriend who is 35 and her adoption agency says she is on the cusp of being too old. Where does that leave my 39-year-old-chassis?

Okay, now I want to go see When Harry Met Sally. And I don't have to wait for the Blue Ray® edition, either. [I started this post on 4/10/07 but only got the title and the quotes at that time.]


Diane Mandy said...

Nice post! When Harry Met Sally is one of my favorite movies, too! The age, effects of gravity, the children--I hear ya. Pretty much everything except the thingy falling off. :-)

Angel... said...

Hi Leesa,

Very nice post...I remember I saw this movie before long time ago..and I remember they were confronted with the problem "Can a man and a woman be friends, without sex getting in the way?" coz, they fear sex would ruin the friendship.

Thanks for sharing...I feel like watching this movie again.

See you,

Ian Lidster said...

Darlin', I know instinctively you have the best ass in the room -- any room. Unless, of course, my wife is there, then I'd have to say that she does, mainly because I do like having an actual as opposed to just a fantasy sex life.
I too love When Harry Met Sally.

~Deb said...

God - 35 is too old now? Remember in the news where there was a lady that was 65 yrs old who gave birth (was a surrogate mother for her daughter) and it was a healthy baby? There are increase chances of autism and stuff like that after 45 I think...not sure about the facts on it.

Competition with women. Hrmm... See, with me, I look at a woman's butt and think, "Oooooh niceeeeeeeeee!"

Does that make me more in the 'male' category on this topic?

グラント said...

I love the movie, but I grew to hate all the people who referenced it as the relationship bible. Especially the ones who insisted that men and women could never be friends, simply because Harry said so.

nosthegametoo said...

Howdy stranger!!

Stopping by to say hello and read one of the blogs I miss.


Leesa said...

diane: yeah, that would have been a bit much to wish on anyone.

angel: yeah, I actually think a man and a woman can be friends without sex getting in the way. I wonder how many men feel the same way.

ian: you are so sweet.

~deb: I think your religious leanings may make you less competative than me.

grant: yeah, I did not want that movie becoming "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenence"

nos: howdy stranger.