Monday, April 21, 2008

The Pizza Man

After Amy arrived, the evening could begin. Amy was always late.

Deb had brought over the movies, something men would call "chick flicks" but in actuality are movies with plots and without explosions. We called up the local pizza parlor, then started watching "The Notebook."

Gretchen started making her margaritas, and we completely engrossed in the movie when the doorbell rang.

Leesa, the flirt of the group, bounces towards the door. One minute later, she comes back to the group, and asks if the group is up for a bit of fun. All agree, not knowing exactly what they are agreeing to.

Leesa returns to the door and the pizza and asks the middle-aged man if he would need a break from delivering pizzas that night.

"A break?" asks the pizza man.

"Well," Leesa continues, tucking her hair behind her right ear nervously, "you are really cute, and I wondered if you would spend a few hours with me and my three tipsy friends."

"Miss," the pizza man continued, "although I am done with this pizza run, I have to return and pick up more pies. I have another hour until I clock out. And I have to go back to the pizza parlor."

"Well," Leesa continued, smiling, "I think your car just got a flat. I think you need to call your employer and tell him about your flat. I have a can of "Fix A Flat" in my car, if you need it. It will take about an hour to find, however."

Then Leesa seductively ran her right index finder down the front of her summer dress.

"I think this is a wonderful way to spend an hour or two."

The pizza man's draw dropped, his mind wondering if the risk was worth taking.

The problem with porn, most of it, is that it is fairly unrealistic. There is no back story that makes things seem plausible. Now, I don't know if I would ever write things that would be considered erotic, but I did want to start a pizza man story, not to have another erotic story, but to show how most erotic stories have little plot.

I love a good story – perhaps it does not need good plot. I mean, there is something to be said for character development as well. There are different types of stories, ones where action is the key, or dialog, or whatever, but a good story needs to have something.

Still looking for something.


グラント said...

You mean you think the Penthouse forum letters aren't the pure, unvarnished truth? Blasphemy!

Leesa said...

grant: "Dear Penthouse, I have read your magazine for many years, and I never thought I would write. I am a young, boxom blonde . . ."

How can these letters not be true.

Advizor said...

I have based my whole dating life on those letters. Please don't burst my bubble.

But I have to tell you about what happened to me and my friends on Spring Break.... and I swear that is exactly how it happened.....

~Deb said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
~Deb said...

Interesting. I had an ex who I referred "The Notebook" to, (the book) which happened to be the same girl that got caught "kissing me" on my couch while the pizza man looked in over us....for quite a LONG time. He knocked slowly and stuttered as he asked if we ordered the pizza. Poor guy had to go home though.

You peeking in on my life???

This was great!

Ian Lidster said...

Aw, c'mon. Did the pizza man stay. Did he get to realize his fondest fantasies and lay nubile young chicks. Beating hearts want to know.
But, it's true, story line carries so much, as does character and if you leave your reader with 'then what?' you are onto something.
That was fun, and running the finger down the front of the dress spoke volumes.

SSC said...

I thought it was good. At first I was really thinking that it was true. Then I remembered, no she's married....What a dork. But you had me with the finger running down the front of the dress.

richmanwisco said...

Damn, just as I was starting the bow chicka wah wah.

Stacy The Peanut Queen said...

Oh, there's LOTS of erotic stories out there with plots (although they're no Stephen King's or Anne Rice's).

Check out the works of "Ellora's Cave". They have some might fine smuth available. We're on a first name basis. ;)

They even have calls for submissions for short stories and contests....and I'm trying to come up with something good enough to enter. I LOVE writing erotic stuff.

Leesa said...

advizor: very funny.

~deb: very clever.

ian: this post was not really about the pizza man. It was about most porn not really having a plot. But most want the story to continue.

ssc: thanks, sweetie. I liked that detail as well.

rich: sorry to disappoint.

stacy: there is great erotica. Marquis de Sade is wonderful - because it is not only erotica, but great literature.