Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Better than Sex

On Monday, someone made the comment that golf is almost better than sex. At first, I was wondering what kind of putter he is working with – okay, a joke. Then I remember what a golfer once told me. He said that there is no feeling like hitting a perfect strike, and watching the ball climb into the sky, then fall to the Earth, inches from where you intended on smacking the ball. Okay, he used different words, and golfers probably know by my description that I don't golf.

I have not ever hit such a shot. I have not gotten that feeling. But it does explain why the game is so well-loved. The rest of us just have not hit such a shot.

When I was in high school, I remember listening to a cool kid say once, "Pizza is like sex. Even bad pizza is good." The guy was a football player, ultra hunk, and I thought he was also a philosopher. My guess is that he read that either on a bumper sticker or as a joke inside of Playboy. God, he was a hunk. He is probably towing cars in Buford, SC now. Not that there is anything wrong with that.

Until recently, I did not get the phrase, "Better than sex." I thought there was nothing better than (good) sex. Well, I have found something.

I was listening to some live music a few weeks ago, and I swear it was better than sex. The bar was dingy – or should I say atmospheric. There was a blues band, and I am not a blues aficionado. I just don't understand all of the nuances in blues.

We start listening to the band, and my first impression was that this band was good, really good. By the third song in the set, the music was touching my soul. I was happy and sad at the same time, moving to the music.

Then the fourth song surprised me. It touched me in a more earthly place, and I swear I almost had an orgasm. Listening to music. There were tiny beads of sweat on my brow, and after the song, I was flushed. I was not bumping and grinding. I was listening to music.

Maybe the first three songs were foreplay. The fourth song was when the guitarist plowed his notes deep inside of me, playing with all that is sexual and good. The rest of the set did not give me quite the satisfaction, but I did have a grin on my face.

Needless to say, we stayed for a second set. I am not saying that the music is better than all sex. But it would make my top 20 sexual experiences, if I could ever rank such a thing.

Just some young blues player giving me the thrill of the night.


Lara said...

Now I wanna hear this guy! Cause I'm always waiting for something to make my top 20 sexual experiences list better.

Anonymous said...

I met a blogger once who said that if she concentrated hard enough - and I wish I know what she was thinking about - she could give herself an orgasm without even touching herself. And the more I have read the more women I have heard say similar things.

As far as "better than sex" I think it's just a phrase that people use to describe how good something is. I don't think I've ever found anything that can top sex at least on a consistent basis.


グラント said...

I wonder how the band would react if they asked for requests and you shouted "Anal!" Let me know how that goes.

Leesa said...

lara: he was absolutely amazing.

edge: if I were that blogger, I would not need food, water, shelter, nothing else. What a wonderful super-power.

grant: I think you and your therapist need to probe into your fascination with anal sex. And, yes, I used the word "probe" deliberately.

LarryLilly said...

And its entirely possible that the set you heard was his BEST ever, and he is also filled with the same energy that you are.

And maybe he will have that performance on a Utube some night

Ian Lidster said...

In my life experience, and I've had some thrilling moments, like doing rolls in a jet fighter, and seeing the Colosseum in Rome for the first time, but nothing, absolutely nothing in my esteem is better than sex.

Diane Mandy said...

I could believe that hearing a certain song or music would be better than sex. I'm a salsa dancer and, let me tell you, I've had some dances that were also better than sex.

Tim said...

I've played the guitar for many years now and when I started back in high school and played in bands in college, it was a great way to meet girls and HAVE sex... It was never better than sex.. Ha Ha... Liked the post.

Anonymous said...

The ecstacy or enjoyment that most people associate with "sex" is more than just the physical sensations. It is the intensity of the intimate connection between two people. This connection can manifest itself in MANY ways. Leesa, it doesn't surprise me that music did it for you. Music is a powerful "connector" of people. So is dancing, as one comment so eloquently stated. People who cannot imagine anything as good as sex simply cannot......imagine. ;^)

Advizor said...

I am not a good golfer, I'm not horrible, I mean I play well enough to get invited back the next week, but I've never shot par over 9 holes, or put more than 2 birdies back-to-back. I've lost more balls than I care to admit, and save all of my creative swearing for the course.

However, I keep coming back to play. I keep coming back because it only takes one shot, one beautiful hanging drive, a perfect short iron to the green, a long putt that curls gently into the hole, to make you feel like you are Tiger Woods, and that Golf is the best game in the world.

And sex is a lot like golf. Contrary to Leesa's hunky high school friend, there is a lot of bad sex. Sex that is boring, sex that is angry, sex that hides problems, and sex that just leads to more heartache.

But then there is the good sex. Times when the intimacy is just right, when your hearts and minds are connecting, when her hands and your body, and the video camera are all in perfect alignment. There's sex when you climax together, when she goes first and you get to watch, or when it's all about me, and she's just there to help.

When golf is good, it's very good, but when sex is good, it's transcendent, exquisite, and available on YouTube.

Golf and sex are also alike because it's fun to play alone or in groups, you get to wear funny clothes and play with balls, sticks, and holes, and eventually you'll hear someone say, "oooh, that one got wet."


SSC said...

I think I need to visit that club and listen to that music.

Leesa said...

larry: I think the guitar player has this high often. I envy him in a way.

ian: I have had a bunch of experiences that have been great. Maybe better than sex, maybe not. But they were great.

diane: Salsa is a very senual dance.

tim: thanks.

annon: so true, so true.

advizor: precisely. Precisely. That's what I am talking about!

ssc: you would have a blast! Or more. Trust me.