Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Leggings my Ass

Last week, I was walking with my husband, and I found myself looking at some woman's ass in front of us. It was a perfect ass, and as I reminded myself not to stare by striking up a conversation with my husband, I saw that he was staring also.

Part of me thought of not confronting him, but that part of me did not win the internal argument.

Me: You are looking at her ass. [A completely harsh statement by me because I direct this at hubbie and use the word "ass" instead of "butt," signaling my displeasure.]

Hubbie: No I am not.

Me: Yes, I saw you looking at her ass. [This time I stress the "ass."]

Hubbie: I was just looking into space.

Me: Whatever.

Okay, there are a few things that displeased me with the interaction: (1) I was not too truthful, since I was looking at her ass as well, but I just did not get caught. (2) Hubbie lied to me, but you know, it was his safest avenue to traverse. After all, I think he was sparing my feelings. (3) She was wearing leggings. I wore leggings in the 1980s! Leggings were a bad idea then, and I cannot imagine them making a comeback. Of course, how many people would have thought the New Orleans Saints would be 3-0 in this young football season?

But that interaction also brought up some thoughts about getting away with infidelities. I have not "gotten away with anything", so to speak, but I was thinking if I had – does it make it any better? Any kinder for hubbie? I know it makes it no better for me, but for hubbie? I am not sure. I know it would have spared his feelings, but it probably would not have strengthened our marriage.

And after all of this, what am I thinking about: no way do I want to buy leggings. I mean, I have done my penance already.


Edge said...

Leggings were hot in the 80's. Tons of college girls are wearing them now. Man! I miss the 80's, but the hair is much better now.

I think if I was your husband, I would have been more forthcoming if you had said, "Her ass was smokin' hot! How could you help not notice, and I DID catch you, but wasn't it a really GREAT ass?"

Everyone is off the hook then.


Tony said...

so, you were watching him stare at her ass, or did you look over and see his eyes looking in that direction and immediately assume he had been looking for awhile? How long had he been staring? Was he ogling or just glancing? Is it ok for you to appreciate it's beauty and not allow him the same?

I've been guilty of looking at a girls butt while whe walked in front of us, however, it was not with any sort of sexual or physical thought in mind. I've been caught "looking" and when asked what I was thinking I sheepishly replied that I had been thinking about how I was going to finish tiling the kitchen floor around the vent. While this was true, it wasn't perceived as true by my wife.

As far as infidelity goes, if you've already decided you're not going to buy leggings and you don't tell your husband then I think that as long as the leggings are all you're wearing, he won't know any different.

Prata said...

That was rather hypocritical of you now wasn't it?


mal said...

Leggings? OMG! I heard they were back...I am thinking of putting a wood stake thru the first pair I see and hope it dies...AGAIN

Cookie Monster said...

Been reading your posts for a while and must say your writing is just wonderful.... that said and done.... when last did you look at a guy with a really great butt, oops sorry ass? I know what went through your hubbys mind I have been in the exact sitaution..

Pittchick said...

My hubby blatantly looks at other chicks in front of me. I don't really care, I know he's just looking and would never go beyond that. I do call him on it every now and then, but only because I think it's funny. I never get mad at him for it.

Oswald Croll said...

first, I do not support the lie your hubby told, but I do understand why he told it. for the record, we look, just like we know women chack out other men's bicepts and pecs and we accept it (because they are clearly gay). when asked about it, the best thing is to say, "hey, she works hard at having a nice butt and I appreciate it, but I love yours". either that or pretend not to hear your wife's question and answer with "huh", then fake a stroke.

Rachel said...

Not only are leggings coming back, but so are leg warmers? I won't be caught dead in either. I never wore leg warmers and leggings were done in the early 90's. Both are guaranteed to make your legs look huge. Blech!!!

Cinderella said...

LOL that is so funny...you know he would never own up to it, he got caught, can you say busted?

LOL your convo sounded like a convo I have had with the husband unit!

Stoяmy Dazέ said...

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Leesa said...

Jef: Leggings hot? On skinny nineteen-year-olds, perhaps.

tony: wow - a long comment today. Yeah, I was sort of a bitch that day.

prata: yes, dear, hypocritical. Sort of the point of it all.

mal: exactly.

cookie: not sure the exact hour and time, but your point is well-taken.

dna: I could not handle that.

oswald croll: seems like these little lies are fairly common.

rachael: leg warmers? are you kidding?

cinderella: yeah, I think this is a common verbal exchange.

stormy: you are quite welcome.

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