Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Does Beta mean "Warning" in Latin?

I saw something the other day: "Sign into Blogger in Beta." I don't like beta at all. Beta to me means, "please spend your time being an unpaid guinea pig so we don't have to pay skilled people to work the kinks out." Now I know that hundreds of really stupid people (me) clicking on what I am not supposed to click on, using the software in unintended ways is hard to pay someone to do. I have been told that hundreds of people throughout the United States show up to ER's throughout the nation with light bulbs up their asses. Who would have thought of putting fragile glass in one's orifices? I mean, in America we do stupid creatively.

So anyway, I see this beta button on Blogger and it scares the crap out of me. It really does. I can see pressing a button that completely erases my blog. One day. No blog. Of course I have been absent lately so maybe I can reclaim some time.

Beta seems to be a bad word. When I was younger, I remember the Betamax and VCR debate (Beta vs VCR, really). Okay, I was a child and there is no way we could have afforded a Beta machine – but I do remember that Beta tapes were more expensive and there were fewer titles available. Again – Beta may have had the better technology, but all being said, it was second fiddle. It was bad.

Then we had the fish – Betas. All I remember is that every once in a while, someone would add one to a fish tank, and the betas would be so aggressive, they would kill all of the other fish in the tank. Take that, Neon Tetra! Take that, Algae Eater! It never happened to me, but I suspect it happened to the same people who years later could not sit down in an ER waiting room because they had a 100-watt bulb up their butt.

Now I know some techies love beta! They get to look at programs before most of us. Perhaps they have good stories about how they caught some major bug – or perhaps they had to reformat their hard drive because the program did something to some dll – I am using my small knowledge of computers to dazzle those who can't tell the difference from their butt from a light socket. The rest of you will just curl your hair around your pointer finger (women and Mike) or scoff (Prata) or do whatever men do – scratch your crotch, visit a sports website or whatever.

Me, I am not into beta. Or into sticking foreign objects in my butt. But that's just me.


Mike said...

Oddly enough, I fear beta as well.


I've heard enough bitching about it from those who have switched.

Advizor said...

Leesa, I am intrigued by your final line of your posting today, does this mean that you've never dated anyone but American men? hee-hee.

And as for beta, I have to agree with you 100%. I work in IT, and I am constantly being asked to test a "pre-release" version of some piece of software or another. why do they think that I have time to test their software? Why would I want to work for free? Why would I put my data, my computer, and my company's productivity in the hands of some unfinished, untested, and unreliable product? I just don't get it.

Have a great day, and watch out for those lightbulbs.

Tony said...

beta; as in, beta believe it will come back and bite you in the.....

Grant said...

I have heard that a friend of a blogger lost her entire blog while trying to use beta, so it's a legitimate fear. Of course, I think the part to worry about should be "google" instead of "beta".

Prata said...

You shouldn't be using windows if you don't like being a beta tester. Actually, Beta is not really all that bad. Beta is a best working prototype of an application to be presented for public consumption (gold or 1.0).

Alpha is the term used for software that will probably blow up spontaneously and is heavy development.

~Deb said...

Well between you and me, Mike didn't tell you about the hamsters he experimented with. Ssshhhh, this will be just our secret, okay?

Beta scares the crap outa' me too. Some girl, I forget who--another blogger, switched to beta and *poof*-----her entire blog was erased---done, finished!


mal said...

being a "beta tester" has reeked of sitting in for a crash dummy on the test sled used to evaluate automobile air bags

Leigh said...

I just have to say I fricken hate beta. It doesn't like me much either.

Hope you are having a good week.

Zack said...

Sony invented vhs, but felt Betamax was better. They sold it to Panasonic, who clearly out marketed them with a product that was not as good as Betamax. They did it by flooding the market with more machines and tapes. When the consumer saw more tapes and models for vhs, plus at a cheaper price, they bought vhs. Sony now pays a royalty to Panasonic for every vhs player they sell.

Leesa said...

mike: thanks for the information.

advizor: did not get the first joke. Understand what you mean about not wanting to donate your time - though lots of IT guys do most of the beta testing.

tony: agree completely.

grant: Google will be (is) the next Microsoft.

prata: funny! I have heard that about Windows. I have actually heard about alpha testing.

~deb: I did not even want to go there; hamsters and all. Yuck.

mal: nice analogy.

leigh: good week for you as well!

zack: I did not know that. Interesting.

Dr. Deborah Serani said...

I love how your write!!!!!!!!!
I'm avoiding Beta too.

Anonymous said...

I am using beta for new blogs kept old blog seperate. I like it so far it has categories and seems easy for the stupid. said...

LOL. Everything from Google is "BETA" so I guess they made their own meaning which is "We'll try this and if it doesnt work we'll just ditch it."


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