Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Of Cocktails and Vestigial Tails

When I was in college, I had a friend named Carly. Okay, that was a lie (even though you may not have picked up on the micro-expressions), but I still occasionally see her so I am hiding the name.

Anyway, she was a couple of years older than I was, but she stayed in the dorms.

Over time, her room was a room of refuge for two reasons: she always had wine, and she had a nice stereo system with lots of good tunes. I mean, think about it, after studying in the evening, we would go to Carly's room, she would have the stereo on softly, and we would talk and drink. What a way to unwind before bed on a school night.

There are a few things that this may indicate: I was a functional alcoholic. Well, not sure if I was really a functional alcoholic, but I drank a lot.

Anyway, the wine that Carly enjoyed, after a while, was box wine. We would go through a couple of boxes per week, maybe more. She called it her truth box. It was kinda cute in a alcoholic denial sort of way.

Well, she, me and several others would chat about this or that, listen to music and just have a good time. It seemed to be a relaxing time, and we discussed all sorts of things. I mean, we would discuss religion, politics, teaching assistants, foreign films, drinking games, musical groups, whatever.

And we would go out together – generally on Thursday nights because the clubs were full and the cover charges did not apply to us. We would get ready, and go over to Carly's room, then start drinking out of the truth box. Even though we did not pay covers, we still had to pay for drinks. And most of us would just drink the free water to keep hydrated at the bars.

Carly generally changed while we were in the room, and I can still remember looking at . . . her ass. Unlike normal people (okay, me), when she changed to go out, she would change her undies as well. Her back would be to the group, so that there was no "frontal nudity", so to speak, and she would slip off her undies, pause, and then slip on the other pair that she would have in her hands. She was a fairly thin girl/woman – we all were, come to think of it – and her spinal column could be seen, each vertebrate clearly shown in a line, running down her back. But it appeared as if she had a few extra vertebrae, forming a bit of a tail near her butt. Actually, after the first time I saw it, I made it a point of looking at my backside with a mirror. No vestigial tail for me.

Now, I have probably seen her ass more than any (unrelated) woman I have ever seen. The first time I saw her butt, I was a bit embarrassed, but over time, I got used to Thursdays with Carly's ass. I secretly suspected she was an exhibitionist.

Actually, one night I started wondering if she were perhaps an alien. I mean, I figured that aliens would resemble lizards. I am not sure if it was because I used to watch Land of the Lost (with the Sleestak) or because I was a little too tipsy while thinking, but I began wondering if she could be some sort of lizard alien. You know, these lizard-aliens did something to make her look humanoid, but there was still a vestigial tail after the transformation to humanoid form.

And then I started thinking about her truth box, the wine-in-a-box. Did I have any missing hours after consuming the alcoholic beverage? Oh, I was not sure. And the soft music and conversation about all sorts of things – was this someone who knew how to host a group of friends, or was this was a lizard-alien who was getting intell from a bunch of college co-eds? I never really found out.

I continued to partake of the truth box, the wonderful music and the conversation because it was a wonderful time in my life. That, and a Thursday night ass view. It was almost as if I was a frat boy who frequented strip clubs. Well, strip clubs don't have good music, do they?


Deb said...

Ok, wait - did she bare her ass or was it just that you could see her through the clothes? I was confused with that one.

I don't believe what you guys were doing was actually, an "alcohol problem", for the love of God you were in college unwinding after a hard day. We all did that around that age, it's whether or not it continued afterward that makes you think, wait - am I???

Truth in a box. I love it! :)

Great post! I enjoyed this one!

Tim said...

What a great story.... I was wondering if you saw the extra vertebrae before the box was opened or after. You know of course that the LAST thing a guy would have noticed is the number of vertebrae leading to her ass... lol

I am a bit older than you since we had no box wine in college and all the studying part was often missed. After a smoke or two or three, we took the mad dog 20/20 out of the freezer and talked nonsense... ha ha
great story

Dominic said...

I'd go with the alien theory. Definitely makes sense.

Thanks for the fun post!

Deb said...

But wait, lol, was she too skinny?

Tim said...

What too skinny Deb? lol

Ian Lidster said...

Now an image of Carly's ass is stuck in my mind and I want to know if my image is accurate and I have no way of finding out. Drat.

Leesa said...

Deb: thanks. I modified it slightly based on your comment.

Tim: the tail was after the box.

Dominic: I really thought she was an alien. Made more sense to me.

Deb: I did not want to "do her." She was skinny but not anorexic. I have known some anorexic women, and they hide their bodies.

Tim: I have helped carry someone who is too skinny.

Ian: Carly's ass was before cell phones (and their cameras) so no pics exist that I know of.

Xmichra said...

Wonder if she did that to coax you into asking about it. I know I would have asked... but I am really too curious for my own good.

Boxed wine, the truth box.. lol.. very funny :)

I agree with Deb, I drank a ton while in college and in that range of 19-23... i think it is a requirement. lol...

Anonymous said...

Definitely an exhibitionist! I wonder if she still undresses in front of others.

btsea said...

Land of the Lost--great show and the blond girl with pigtails was cute! ;)

Leesa said...

Xmichra: Yeah, I know. I knew a counselor who specialized in alcohol. She told me I was not an alcoholic, just a college student.

Jules: in college, I occasionally was in my undies, but I don't think I would completely strip in front of others. I normally don't even have to do that with medical personnel.

btsea: When I think of Land of the Lost, my mind first thinks of their lizard people. And then the bad acting. I had nightmares for months after watching that show.

~gkw said...

so many things to comment on... WOW a Sleestak reference, an exhibitionist with a tail, Box wine, and I keep getting distracted by the picture in your last post....

Leesa said...

~gkw: all sorts of things makes a good story.

Awake In Rochester said...

LOL! How many drinks did it have before you decided she was a lizard-alien?

Leesa said...

awake: fewer drinks than you might imagine.

Blogger said...

I have just installed iStripper, so I can watch the sexiest virtual strippers on my desktop.